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For a desired boy to be soft and effeminate is no bad thing, unlike for a man. But
a boy who is not castrated is expected to grow out of youthful softness, and is considered to have failed as a man if he does not. As Craig Williams writes, “While the effeminacy of cinaedi was a serious failing, we will see that beautiful boys might be charmingly
butch or delightfully soft and girlish. In other words, boys could get away with things
that cinaedi could not. Indeed, one might say that the image of the cinaedus served as a
reminder of what could happen if the normative transition from passive, penetrated puer
to active, penetrating vir, did not take place as expected.”139 Eunuchs, however, are
failed men by design. They are not supposed to grow out of boyish softness, and by their
extended boyishness, remain objects of sexual desire.140

Oh shit I want to cry then. It makes me feel as if a failure and I consider this very unjustified                    (つ﹏<。)    then, what about you?!
EUNUCHS AND SEX: BEYOND SEXUAL DICHOTOMY IN THE ROMAN WORLD _______________________________________ A Dissertation presented to the Faculty of the Graduate School at the University of Missouri-Columbia